If Fleas Had Feelings

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#127 If Fleas Had Feelings
Could it really be?
Mused the flea,
That I'm not entirely liked?
It's with some despair,
That I roam this hair,
With my interest quite clearly spiked.

I can run, I can jump,
Over mighty high bumps,
But this really is bothering me.
I'm nice most the time.
I mean, is that a crime?
So why are they harrasing me?

Even the cat,
Where we live in our flat,
Doesn't tell us to leave right away.
But then maybe because,
He can't talk he just does,
Tolerate us through the day.

How nice to be loved,
By those up above,
And maybe here's what I should do.
Jump up on her leg,
And then pleadingly beg,
Before she hits me, head on, with her shoe.

Well here goes I guess,
I can't be liked less,
Jump up and I'm free of the cat.
She's seen me I'm sure,
As she stares at the floor,
"Hello Person, I've just come to"...SPLAT!

I have a punishing workout regimen. Every day I do 3 minutes on a treadmill, then I lie down, drink a glass of vodka and smoke a cigarette. Anthony Hopkins

In awe I watched the waxing moon ride across the zenith of the heavens like an ambered chariot towards the ebon void of infinite space wherein the tethered belts of Jupiter and Mars hang forever festooned in their orbital majesty. And as I looked at all this I thought...I must put a roof on this lavatory.
Les Dawson

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Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother Colin. Or my younger brother Ho-Chan-Chu. But I think it's Colin. Tim Vine

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home. Bill Cosby

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